“Some of us do not succeed no matter how we try, for deep inside we have the need to always buy the lie.” ~ John Peitzman (JP)
For some of us there is a consistent negative internal dialogue that takes place in our minds. The good news is you don’t have to listen to it!
According to the National Science Foundation, the average person has about 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Some say this number is much higher. Of these thousands of thoughts, apparently 95% are exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before and a whopping 80% are negative.
This has been going on day in, day out since your ‘inner child’ was shaped by whatever life experiences you were subjected to. These on-going negative thought patterns continue into maturity and can dramatically sabotage our efforts to find success and happiness. We tell ourselves we are not good enough. We tell ourselves we will never reach the next level. We tell ourselves we will not find love, joy, peace of mind or balance in our lives. And we believe it! Most of us are not even aware of this. This lack of awareness is the biggest part of the problem.
The good news is that once you are aware of these ongoing negative thoughts, you can do something about it. You don’t have to listen. You don’t have to take them seriously. You don’t have to ‘buy the lie’. When we realize these random, repetitive thoughts for what they are – simply patterns of mind and emotion – in that awareness comes the ability to do something different. Stop giving them attention. Know they are not true. Understand that feelings are not facts. Let go of the need for this pattern to persist.
If you stop feeding these patterns of negative self-talk with your attention, they starve to death and no longer exist. Does this take some time? Sure. Does this take some effort? You bet. Does this result in you being able to dramatically transform your life experience positively and reach levels of success you otherwise thought unattainable? Absolutely!
There are many techniques and tricks to change your habits of mind when these negative thoughts arise. From replacing them with ‘positive’ or ‘possible’ thinking… to getting up and getting active… to truly accepting what you cannot change… to reframing, to literally giving your negative talker a name (i.e. it is not you), as well as visualizing a tiny box into which you place your problem in order to gain perspective (i.e. it’s really not that big of a deal).
No matter what techniques you utilize, the process begins with the mindfulness that it is happening, the awareness to not take it seriously, and the insight to do something about it.